In my early childhood special education training I learned to give children words.

At the center I was working at during this time we typically told children to “use their words”.

In theory “use your words” is great.

But what if the child doesn’t know what words to use?

When it comes to preventing and de-escalating challenging behavior in early childhood classrooms, meeting a child where they’re at can go a long, long way.

One of the things we spoke about at the recent TCB free live training series was the importance of having a PLAN.

Most teachers are required to have a lesson plan.

Even in emergent, project-based, or play-based classrooms it may be more of a scaffolding or flow of the day but there still is a plan for how elements of the day will go.

Let me know below on a scale of 1-10 how equipped with a PLAN for preventing challenging behavior are you?

When I was 22 I was living in Minneapolis. Fresh out of college and underemployed. I joined a free local support group at a women’s center and met my friend Andrea. A few weeks later Andrea said to me, “You said you liked kids, right? I’m looking for a part time aide in my Three’s Classroom…” ..and next thing I knew I was an early childhood educator!

How are you holding up?

It seems like everywhere I turn lately I see an early childhood teacher, family child care provider, instructional aide, manager, coach, director, administrator saying…

I’m beyond exhausted.

I went from a relationship with challenging behavior that was filled with intimidation and humiliation to one of confidence, meaning, and even joy.

What caused this shift?

We all have a relationship with “challenging behavior”.

Every early childhood professional has a relationship to working with children who hit, kick, spit, throw things, tantrum, run out of the room or just don’t listen.

I am not talking about your relationship with specific children.

In actuality, we each have a relationship with the whole idea of “challenging behavior,” with this aspect of our work. Just like we have relationships with other things or phenomena in our life like exercise, sleep, money, time, etc…

Just like relationships with the people in our lives, our relationships with challenging behavior can be healthy, rewarding, maybe even interesting, meaningful…or whatever it is for you.

When it comes to working with children who exhibit challenging behavior you may love that part of the job, or you may think of it as something that gets in the way of teaching…or something that children’s families, your director, a behavior consultant or mental health specialist should fix.

Your relationship with challenging behavior may be heavily flavored with upset that you don’t receive adequate training or support in this area of your work. That’s fair….

In true New Year’s fashion, I’ve been reflecting not only on this past year but also on my journey in early childhood.

I've been thinking about how I went from being completely overwhelmed by challenging behaviors like hitting, kicking, spitting (!?), throwing things, running out of the room, and just not listening…

…to loving working with children who exhibit challenging behavior.

And in fact, feeling a calling to help such children - and those of you who work with them - so much that I’ve in fact made it my life’s work.

In some ways, I was always drawn to those kids who were deemed “challenging” by myself and others.
But that doesn’t mean that early in my career I was successful with them…

Oh my gosh, please tell me you have some time off coming up soon?

It’s WINTER (at least in the United States) and really, shouldn't we be hibernating!?

I don't know about you but I am taking off the last week of December and I am seriously counting the days.

Don't get me wrong...I loooooooove my job!

I'm currently working on preparing training for our TCB Teachers Club ❤️ and preparing for our free, live online Transform Challenging Behavior training series that I'll be leading February (SO excited! ✨) so there's nothing negative about the work itself.

If you’ve been struggling with challenging behavior and nothing you try is working please don’t beat yourself up.

It’s probably because you haven’t received the play-powered folk wisdom of our early childhood ancestors OR your college courses and the training you’ve attended left out the research-based play-powered challenging behavior prevention strategies!

YIKES!