First and for most, how are you holding up?

::exhale::

A lot has happened in a week.

Depending on where you live and how much you interact with the media and the social media, covid-19 may be affecting you, your loved ones, and your community in huge ways (social distancing...local schools closed...shelter at home...difference of opinions on how serious this is and what should be done...hospitals struggling to keep up)...or possibly not too much at all yet.

I know you may still be at work in your early childhood program even though the preK-12 schools have closed in most major cities and some states, perhaps including your own.

I know that if your program or school has closed you may be asked by your director or principal to be in touch with families daily, give them activity ideas, or to even do some sort of read-aloud or circle time via Zoom or FaceTime or some other video call. Or, just to keep in touch via Remind or WhatsApp or similar apps (daily?).

I know that certain government officials are obsessively talking about providing child care to medical workers without uttering a word about child care workers.

I watched the press conference Monday where some astute reporter asked if child care centers were included in the directive to close schools and I watched as Dr. Fauci paused, his face revealing that this had literally never dawned on him. Then listened to his words confirming that they hadn’t discussed that and that he was not sure. He said they would get back to us on that. (NOT dissing on him, we are often an afterthought. This is one example).

I'm upset and angry that early childhood professionals are being taken for granted. But sadly, we shouldn't be shocked by this, right?

As you can see I have a bunch of reactions to what’s been going on and *all the feelings*!

I’m beating myself up for not being more productive while working from home (I always work from home when I’m not traveling to do trainings so why is it so hard!?) even though I’m telling everyone around me to lower their expectations and be gentle with themselves.

I want to give you permission to be upset, scared, confused, and unproductive.

Maybe it’s ok for us to be a little bit of a mess right now?

Be scattered. Be upset. Be angry. Hide in the bathroom and cry...or do it out in the open if you have the conditions to do so. NOT that you need permission from me, just if it’s helpful. I offer you that in the same way I would do it for a friend and hope they would do so for me.

Relatedly, a big theme that's coming up for me in my conversations with people both professionally and personally is that people in positions of leadership are struggling to lead with humanity.

Center directors and corporate CEOs alike are having meetings that are business as usual without acknowledging the Covid-19 pandemic, the impact it’s having, and in some cases the fear or reality of people not getting paid during forced time off.

I’m not by any stretch of the imagination saying I know what to do right now or have the answers.

But generally speaking I have found that it’s good to meet people where they’re at. It’s important not to have any white elephants in the room. It’s general helpful to acknowledge what’s going on and to validate emotions and circumstances, create space for people to be real. To acknowledge the impact of current events, company decisions, and daily interactions.

And, guess what?

As early childhood professionals that’s our wheelhouse. Relationships, meeting people (kids) where they’re at, being aware of the interpersonal environment, and recognizing the importance of the social-emotional realm is our expertise.

We know that all things relationship and social-emotional are actually more important than homework, activities, productivity, or business as usual.

That’s true now more than ever.

So, here’s the best idea I have for what to do right now (after staying at home and hand-washing, of course). Or, at least it's what I've decided to focus on…

Cut yourself gobs of slack.
Trust your gut.
Speak up for yourself and those around you as much as you are able to.
Keep showing up with humanity - help everyone understand that relationships and the social-emotional realm are much more important than ABCs right now (and always, actually).
Maybe ask yourself, "who do I want to be during this time of crisis?"

**What we’ll all remember 3 weeks from now….3 months from now…and 3 years from now is how it felt.**

(Plus weird small details like wanting to eat the canned ravioli when we know we should save that and eat the perishables first).

And that’s what the children will remember, too.

Maybe their home felt like an oasis even though their grown-ups told them something serious was happening, were mumbling something about grandma, and were being extra-vigilant about hand washing…and they'll remember they got to eat extra Teddy Grahams and stay up late.

…OR, they’ll remember that it felt confusing and stressful...they’ll remember huge power struggles because they didn’t want to do their writing activities or shame because they didn’t do them correctly. Devastatingly, they may also remember what they didn’t eat and being hungry.

**The children will remember how things felt. And those small details.**

(My father was born the year the Great Depression started and he talked about eating tomato soup with rice as a boy until the day he died).

So if you’re being asked to send home activities, or be in touch with families, or even do online story-times let families know NOT to drag their kid to the screen. Make it SUPER DUPER OPTIONAL (same for homework!). Maybe some kids just wave a little hello or run and hide. It’s OK.
Let families know that honestly right now we do not have great conditions for learning.

For now…

LET’S WORK TO TAKE THE PRESSURE OFF EVERYONE.

Tell them they can just let their kids play.

(Some families and/or some children will LOVE those activities you sent home and that’s great too. I’m just saying, take the pressure OFF.)

Let’s give each other permission…to be a little unhinged…have all the feels…not get everything done…and to bumble through this together as lovingly as possible, ideally without taking things out on each other.

Sending lots of love to you and those you love. Thank you for the work that you do.

Please let me know in the comments BELOW

How are you holding up?

**Also, what's driving you nuts right now?**

For me I was in high gear and taking action until Sunday night and then *all the people* and *all the things* really started to BUG ME and *all the emotions* started bubbling up.